Forgive us the wrongs we have done,
as we forgive the wrongs that others have done to us.

Matt 6:12, GNT

Have you ever been the recipient of an insincere apology?  Or been the one to begrudgingly say, “I’m sorry,” knowing full well you were not in the least bit sorry?  How about saying “I forgive you” through gritted teeth while crossing your fingers behind your back? 

Forgiveness is hard!  True forgiveness is even harder!  I love this definition of forgiveness: is a conscious, voluntary choice to let go of resentment, bitterness, and the desire for vengeance against someone who has caused harm. It is an internal process that benefits the victim’s emotional well-being rather than an endorsement of the offender’s actions.

Somewhere in my past I was taught to have a “Forgive and Forget” mentality.  But, through the years that hasn’t worked very well for me…as I have found it is next to impossible to forget.  Over and over I have said the proverbial “I forgive you” but would still hold on to the grudge or hurt feelings.  Forgive, yes.  Forget, never.  Over time those feelings would fester and become a bitter root that would take residence in my heart. 

I love what Corrie Ten Boom says,

Forgiveness is not an emotion…Forgiveness is an act of will,
and the will can function regardless of the temperature of the heart.

So, here is what I am learning…forgiveness is for the well-being of the forgiver not for the release of the forgiven!  The one who benefits from forgiveness is the one who extends it.  Forgiveness frees up space in our hearts and minds.  It allows the one who was hurt to move on and not let that bitterness take root.  It is not about excusing the wrong done or letting the wrong-doer off the hook but rather moving forward and not getting stuck in the muck.  Forgiveness is acknowledging the wrong actions, letting go of the hurt, seeking healing, and moving forward.

Forgiveness is hard!  But having bitterness and resentment in your heart if even harder.  Jesus taught us to pray… Forgive us the wrongs we have done, as we forgive the wrongs that others have done to us.  We should forgive as we have been forgiven.

Blessings,
Pastor Jenni

Our Prayer Experiment: Daily pray the Lord’s Prayer (Matthew 6:9-13). 
Speak it out loud, slowly, deliberately and from the heart.

This week’s Prayer Experiment:  Focus your prayers on this phrase: “forgive us our sins, as we have forgiven those who sin against us.”  Reflect: Who do you need to forgive? Who do you need to ask forgiveness from? Are there any bitter roots taking hold that you need to let go?  Practice: As you reflect ask God to help you lean into forgiveness – for yourself and for others.  Write down the things you need forgiveness from, who you need to forgive, and any bitter roots you need to release.